AI has a place. It is not everywhere.
AI in the right place is magnificent. In the wrong place, it produces Nothing. Sometimes with twelve agents and a progress bar.
Imagine twelve agents debating your flight while you could have clicked “Book.” A fictional example. A suspiciously familiar feeling. Your toaster doesn’t need a chatbot.
We make fun of artificial importance, make room for human creativity, and sell excellent paperwork to help one tech worker trade meetings for a future farm. The ducks have declined the investor deck.
Here’s how you can be part of the joke ↓Choose a Nothing gift, a symbolic tree sponsorship, or simple project support. Clear prices. Real payments. Excellent paperwork.
A personalised digital certificate with their name and your message. A joke that could only come from you.
€19.99 once · no renewalMake a gift — €19.99 ↗You send a private link; your recipient signs in to claim it. No physical delivery.Receive a private digital Tree Passport you can name and personalise, and support the future farm project.
€420.00 per tree · no renewal1 Tree Passport × €420.00 each = €420.001 private digital Passport. One payment. No ownership.
Checking purchase availability…Choose your contribution. Help fund the project and future farm plans; receive a digital Receipt of Zero Value.
From €1 once · no account neededChoose amount & pay ↗One payment. No subscription. The ducks still owe you nothing.The entry-level absurdity
For the friend who said “don’t get me anything.” Finally, somebody listened.
Presented to
A person who has everythingI’m Vasyl. I work in tech. I’d like to spend less time in meetings and more time watching ducks.
Digital purchases support this project and its future farm plans, including operating costs and payment fees. Trees and animals are part of that ambition; the future ducks remain unimpressed.
Future farm projectMake a free card. Ask a friend to write a sentence back. Your group chat has trained for this.
Try the free writing challenge ↗Read the Nothing care guide →A calculator. A coin flip. A text counter. Familiar JavaScript tools with a sales pitch that thinks it’s raising a seed round.
Try the free AI tools →Generate some corporate slop →Discuss future farm or forest sponsorship. Finally, a roadmap with a chance of actual branches.
Ask about company sponsorship →Yes. The products are playful; the charges are real. Every offer shows its digital deliverable, price and billing frequency before payment.
No. You receive a private digital Passport and support the project. No land, tree or animal ownership is included. Planting and original photographs depend on future farm operations and have no guaranteed date.
Purchases support the project, including operating costs and its future farm ambition. You receive the digital product described at checkout; no investment or verified conservation outcome is sold.
Paid skins and physical costumes are future concepts and are not on sale or included today.
No. AI in the right place is magnificent. We make fun of AI squeezed into the wrong place: more agents, more waiting, the same old button. Your imagination is also a perfectly good feature.